... I'll be in Burlington.


And I'll be okay.



More than okay.

Home

this is probably the scariest thing that will be happening to me, in quite some time. it doesnt seem like much, but im so afraid of whta will happen when all of these prorities are gone. as of next week, i will have no obligatinos, no more late nights in the theatre or getting shit together. no more comnig home at midnight manic as all hell. what am i supposed to do then? ill have to think, and feel. i cant do that yet, not jsut now. i dont know when, but i cant do this now.

eh. alright day.
A few of us went to Anyd's with Mark to raid the costume attic for our school play. I SAID MACBETH IN THE ATTIC. so i had to run all the way downstairs and outside and do the little ritual thingy. that was the seoncd time ive said it in a theatre this month!!!! lol
but so i pretty much broke my hadn todya from punching a chair. . i wasnt aiming for the chair, but my target moved. dont ask, it was odd.

so yeah.

I am letting the telephone ring
cause i don't want to know why
i don't want to hear you explain
i don't want to hear you cry
i have written so much about you
so much i thought i knew
words like water used to flow
now what could i possibly have to say?
he is someone i don't even know
and all the things that you've given to me
i see now were simply reparations
they were gifts of your guilt
they were my preparation
i know i should be mature
keep my feet on the floor
but for some reason,
i just don't want them anymore
i know this shouldn't be important
compared to you and i
but i can still hear my questions
and i can still hear you
i can still hear you
lie
now vicariously i have him in me
i want to peel off my skin
let the water wash in
you always said that i was hiding
that i was hiding from you
but you are capable of things i could not do
you are capable of things i could not do
i remember how you pretended
how you pretended to touch me
i remember how i couldn't bring myself to believe
i remember wondering,
what was wrong
how could i be so naive?

just little list of things freshman should look out for...lol completly ment in good humor, of course, but its true.... err, the freshman from GBS soooo have it coming though, you have no idea.... mostly, these are things that i observed from my own freshman class last year so there!



1) You are Not cool.


2) Everyone Does Hate You.


3) You are annoying.


- Do not wear ripped jeans and an Abercrombie shirt because you want to make "a variety of friends."


- Do not slick your bangs to your face and wear "bracelets" in you're ears because you think that you're Hood.


- Sex doesn't make you cool, and if you do have sex don't tell anyone. Nobody cares, really.


- You are a F-R-E-S-H-M-A-N.. not a "Freshie".. shut up you sound stupid.


- Don't think you're smart because you filled up water bottles with vodka and snuck it onto your 8th grade field trip. We've all done it.. so don't be proud.



- Don't try the Emo scene. Just don't do it. (Usually the upperclassmen will just want to help you die.)


- DO NOT think that the upperclass girls/guys are your best friends.


- Don't think that you have privacy now that you're in high school. Once you're here, your business is everyone's business, yes there IS still drama, probably even more.


- Don't try to sit at upperclassmen lunch tables. You will be picked up and thrown onto the floor.


- You'll never be as hott as the '07, '08, and '09 Girls. So don't try.


- Don't try to act older than you really are. The way you walk, dress, and talk just has freshman written all over you.


- You're "The Class of '10'" haha.. enough said.


- If you are black, hispanic, etc. WE GET IT, You love your country! Thats peachy but dont make everything a race related issue.


- PLEASE NO MORE XXXXL shirts and ridiculously baggy pants on skinny white kids, nobody likes white chocolate. Allow me to kick you in the face.


- If you are going to try and rebel, it most likely won't work.


- Don't be a slut. This should be the number one rule.


- DO NOT crowd our halls like cattle, because the upper classmen can (& most likely will), push you out of the way. You will get hurt. And if you expect administration to side with you, remember: they've known us longer.


- Don't try to get with a boy/girl who's older than you. Chances are, if they are attractive they are taken, & their girlfriend/boyfriend will have no problem effing you up.


Welcome to hell.


Believe me---You can't win. Have fun being a freshman...for a fun-filled year with no life and no opinion whatsoever.

Sincerely,

-The Classes of '07, '08, and '09

bottom to top

You lay
On the kitchen floor
With no shirt on
Your fevered cheek
Resting for a moment
Against the cool
Linoleum
It was white
With squares
The same deep blue
As your eyes
And I knew
That no matter
What I did
I could never lift you
Up off that floor
So I turned the house
Upside down
And you fell onto the ceiling
Where you belong